A few weeks back I was in my kitchen grinding some coffee beans to pre-set the coffee maker for the next morning. This act was seemingly so small and mundane, yet I stood in my kitchen with a few tears running down my face as the coffee beans danced. A part of me danced too.
In the fall and winter, a task as simple as grinding the coffee beans felt too exhausting to me. Usually rhythm and routine is what grounds me. As a teacher, routine was built out for me in my days. Once I had to stop working, I had to recreate it all. However, I quickly learned that listening to what my body needed took precedence over anything else, which meant that I would live without any solid routine for a while. What used to be a part of my every day no longer could be and I struggled with that.
Slowly, after coming off of some intense medicines, some of my energy began to return. By the grace of God, I was connected to a job that was part-time and sustainable for me. Now, months later, though I still have a good bit of continual fatigue, more energy flows through me— at least enough for me to work each day of the week and to pre-set my coffee.
As I prepare for being back in school for the next three years, starting next week, I find myself hoping that I still take time to watch my coffee beans dance. I hope that I recognize the gift that is the energy to do so. Though I am grateful for my health being strong enough for my pace of life to return back to a sense of normalcy, I am also recognizing all that was gained from all that has been taken away this year. I have learned that loss has a way of doing that. Loss is always painful, yet sometimes beautiful too. I am at a point where I can finally hold both.
…
When I think of tearing up because of something as small as coffee beans, I think of the past few years we have all lived through and how I may not be the only one who has had one of those moments. In particular, I think of 2020. I think of the ways we each began to see how much in our lives we took for granted. I think of the ways we each went on walks more when the country shut down. Or, how we made a point to smile and wave at our neighbors. I think of how we spent more time talking to the people we love or reconnecting with the people we missed. I think of the music that was created that we are just now beginning to hear. I think of how, even in the shutdown, I took for granted the slowness that was and very well may never again be in our busy society. And, I also think of all the loss—all that the pandemic has taken from people and all that it continues to take. I think of all the trauma and jobs lost and loved ones who have passed. I continue to think of both the pain and the richness that coexisted and continue to do so.
As each of us sit within the natural transition that August always brings, I want to encourage us to take a moment to pause. We are over half way through 2022 and over two years into this pandemic. What has been in your rear view mirror that you haven’t quite given the attention to see recently? What has been a simple part of your day that you lost in 2020, but now have back? How has it been having that back in your life? What in your life right now is mundane, yet rich? What are your coffee beans?
…
All of this leads me to share the next writing compilation prompt:
From the Archives of the Pandemic
We continue to live through a unique period of history. We remember and record history through the written word. I’ve been thinking a lot about how each of us have lived many lives in the past few years. Within that, there have been significant moments we have each experienced. I want to create a space for us to write those experiences or stories or words down and/or to share the ones that have already been written in the past few years, but never shared with another. What is a moment, a memory, or words you have been storing up within you that you want to share? What part of your history do you want to record?
For these compilations, there is no required genre, length, or way of approaching the prompt. Any and all can write. If you would like your writing to be shared in the compilation, email it to me at bnfrederking@gmail.com. I will share more details on my instagram about deadlines and about other prompting questions connected to the prompt.
Words I have Been Paying Attention To:
The day after I stood in my kitchen thinking about the gift it was to have energy to prepare my coffee again, I spent some time at one of my favorite spots in town to write. Below is the poem that came about. It is one I’ve been returning back to a lot recently. It still feels like a draft, but I want to write more poems like it—poems that zoom in on a seemingly mundane, yet significant moments.
Slow Pour
Before I sleep,
I let my coffee beans dance
I dance too,
For the energy
That is
Preparing for
A tomorrow
As I awake,
I relish in the slow pour
Go at your pace
]
I bask in
The stream-rising
For to see the steam,
You must see the light
I’m seeing both again
I’m seeing
Hope rising
I grab my coffee,
To go somewhere
Reminded of a time
My body could not
A List of What I’ve Been Paying Attention To:
The ways a green area in a city is one of the few places in the world where any and all seem to feel welcomed to just be
How much I love seeing someone sitting and reading in public
What new soil can do for a plant
Share back in a comment or an email a few things you’ve been paying attention to recently!
Prompts/Questions:
At the end of every newsletter, I want to leave you all with some questions/prompts to think on. If you ever want a friend to hear your thoughts, feel free to share them back with me! I always love to read and to listen.
Questions:
What is something that others may perceive as small and insignificant in your life, but that means so much to you? Write about why that particular thing matters so much to you. Maybe it is because of a memory or a person you associate with it or the way it makes you feel. Whatever it is, write it out.
Creative Prompts/Celebration Tasks:
One day this week, make a list of the simple and mundane moments in your day that also carry a certain beauty to them. Share your list with a friend!
Letters:
Write a letter to someone you’ve recently spent time with and whom you’ve really enjoyed their company. Let them know the ways you enjoyed your time together and share with them the beauty you see in them.
Closing Words:
My hope for you this week is that you find moments to slow down in all the stress, noise, and exhaustion transition can bring. I hope the small, mundane moments find you in such a way that you have to pause and appreciate them. I hope it is the simple things that ground you and remind you that you can breathe.
…
As you carry on into this week, may your days ahead be filled with words that encourage you, laughter that heals you, and moments of beauty that pull your attention in and bring you to slow down.
May you know that you, yourself, are worth paying attention to.
About Tuesday’s Attention:
This Newsletter was born out of a desire to stay attentive to the world around me, to encourage others to create and to pay attention, and to connect more closely with a readership. If you enjoy these newsletters, you can also support my writing through becoming a part of my Patreon community to get access to more of my writing content. The writing that I do is 100% supported by readers and so any and all support— whether that is you reading this newsletter, sharing it with others, and/or being a part of my patreon means the absolute world to me. Thank you for being here. It is a joy to share this space with you all.
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